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Spammer, Oya do 10,000 Frog Jumps and Slap Yourself!

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What I imagine a spammer looks like in person.
Bushy tail and Beady eyes included!

Lately (and by lately, I mean in the last couple of months), there has been a spike in the amount of spam comments I receive daily.  I have no idea why this has happened or what is going on, but I know I am not alone.  I suspect this is specific to Blogger though, because Wordpress is awesome has an array of better spam-combating techniques.

While I silently pray that this spamming episode will pass away soon, I have had moments when I imagined myself punishing spammers for this rubbish.

If I was a senior girl and spammers were my juniors, I would sentence ... sorry command them to do 10,000 frog jumps.

Oya jump, jump, jumpology ...

If they can still walk after that, then I would give them my all-time favorite self-inflicted punishment: slapping yourself.

Raise your hand if you were ever told to slap yourself by anyone older than you or just in authority over you.

*Relentless raises both hands*

Aha! I knew I wasn't alone.

Anyway, I would say to each spammer: "Oya, slap yourself," lean back and enjoy the satisfaction of watching them comply.

For my mind sha ...

The problem with my fantasy is that I can't decide how many times to tell a spammer to slap himself (or herself).  Truthfully, I hope the frog jumps would have done their work.

*turns to spammer*: "You still dey look me? My friend, slap yourself. Nonsense!"

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